Tuesday, February 5, 2008

I feel a personal need to vote for Hillary Clinton and a policy obligation, I think, to vote for Barack Obama.

Every time I tell myself I've decided one way or the other, my stomach turns over.

My prediction for tomorrow is that I will vote for Barack and then blub because I feel like I somehow betrayed Hillary; because I couldn't vote for her also.

It really is a personal thing, though. I feel like she's someone I know who has worked so hard and done everything right (not to say she's perfect or never made a mistake, but if your goal in life is to be President, she's been pretty damn well on track), and could never be good enough (see crazed detractors), and is coming so close--and whom I like and respect--and I will not have done what I could to get her there.

Not to mention I would really like to vote for a woman.

But I just feel a policy obligation to go the other way. I suppose IL was gonna go for Obama anyway (fucking electoral college), but but but meh.

I really hope after Super Tuesday I can stop reading election stuff for a while and, y'know, have some idea what's going on in the world.

EDIT: I suppose it's worth mentioning that I've been in a bit of a funk for the past few days and I have found myself more than usually willing to blub, and so the above angst should be taken with a grain of seasonal affective disorder or wet shoes or what have you.

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